About my Memoirs
Historically, there have always been situations where you needed exceptionally good troops for a special mission. That’s what commandos are: the most capable troops, sent to take care of the most difficult missions. Until a century ago, the commandos were summoned with the phrase, “Send me your best men.” The exploits of these exceptional warriors became part of many cultures, the warrior myths that were based on real ones. These formidable warriors were seen as Perfect Soldiers… — James F. Dunnigan
In Guard of Honor uniform. Me (5th from left).
Guard of Honor at the Istana,1987. Here I am (second from right). Holding the sword and accompanying the Prime Minister of Papau New Guinea is our Commanding Officer. Behind him is beloved Singapore President Wee Kim Wee. The picture was published in the Strait Times. Big thanks to the newspaper for sending me a complimentary high-quality print.
I served in the 5th Company, 1st Commando Battalion for my two and a half years (Jun 1985 to Dec 1987) of National Service. The battalion was one of the toughest in the Singapore Army.
It was the greatest ordeal of my life. I faced danger, pain, heat exhaustion, hunger, sleeplessness, grief, and despair. I also made mistakes, some with potentially tragic outcomes, but I learned precious lessons that I would never have learned any other way. Till the day I die, I would never forget these two and a half years.
Exhaustion
The training was far more grueling than what I had expected. No Rambo bravado; no Hollywood “tough guy” persona.
Sleep was never enough. Once, I had no sleep at all for five days and five nights. I fought to stay awake even when my eye lids weighed a ton. Given the chance, we slept in whatever conditions we found ourselves in. Some even fell asleep standing.
Training day and night, we were constantly exhausted. We pressed on even when our bodies screamed for rest. We persevered even when our legs felt like collapsing and our lungs gasped for breath.
Injuries
Injuries were widespread. Some malingered, exaggerating injuries to escape training. (One even consumed ten pain-killer tablets to escape training.) But most of our injuries were all too real. When our National Service ended, only half of us remained in the company as combat-fit soldiers. In the following stories (see links below), I describe the injuries – some of which I suffered myself.
I was among the combat-fit half, but my serious lower back injury eventually took its toll, forcing me to be downgraded (declared not combat fit) years later as a reservist. Magnetic Resonance Imaging at the National University Hospital revealed three damaged disks – two seriously (L4 and L5). Doctors certified that I could do no more parachute jumps. I had mixed feelings. Though glad for my safety (so were my parents), I missed the thrill of jumping.
Deprivations
The unique army experience taught me to appreciate the basics in life such as water, sleep and rest, which I had often taken for granted. A cold soft drink, a nice warm bed and a telephone conversation (pre-handphone days) with a caring civilian friend were considered luxuries.
Danger
My own life-and-death situations, as well as the deaths of fellow soldiers, show that life is fragile and fleeting. Life is precious; I learned not to take it for granted. I am grateful to God and to my parents for giving me life.
Humbling Lessons
The experience also taught me to be humble and to rely upon the good Lord above. Countless times I found my physical and mental strength failing, but God was always there for me with His amazing grace. I faced many impossible odds, and God always came through for me just when I had lost hope. These words of the Bible were true:
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Psalm 73:26 NIV
God, in His infinite wisdom and mercy, had looked ahead. He knew that such training would benefit me as I faced more trials. Till today, I don’t know how I survived. Angels must have been watching over me.
I share my experiences in Memoirs of a Singapore Commando. Thank you for reading till here. I appreciate your comments. God bless you.
My Army Pictures Slideshow 1985-1987 (4 mins 47 secs)
My Army Picture Album (A separate website for pictures)
“You have never lived ’til you’ve almost died. For those who fight for it, life has a flavor the protected will never know.”
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1.
joe |
2010/12/11 at 10:46 am
Hi i was from 3rd coy 2001-2003. You mention u no sleep for 5 days 5 night? then you must be going through SOF hell week.
2.
Allan |
2011/02/27 at 4:48 pm
Great work here. It brings be back to my old days at the old Commando camp, as well as the reservist years at Hendon that followed. I am a few years your junior, but I can totally relate to what you have published here. For honor and glory!
3.
Raj Mohan |
2011/12/16 at 9:41 pm
I have the greatest respect for the soldiers of the “old” SAF. Enjoyed exploring your website and thanks for your service…..
Raj Mohan
(6 SIR 2000-2002)
4.
Chris Lee |
2012/01/28 at 2:45 pm
Dear Raymond,
I stumbled upon your video clip while browsing on the Special Forces website. It was very humbling reading your account of your tough experiences while serving NS as a Commando. Sharing your testimony of God’s loving protection was also very encouraging and inspirational.